Filed under: Uncategorized
According to Daniel Pink, former speech writer to Al Gore the factors that motivate us to achieve and perform well at work are not money, status or a shiny office with a great view. No, the things that send our performance to the outer orbits are the intrinsically based factors of autonomy, mastery, and purpose.
He backs up his claims by citing reams of scientific research as evidence. You can listen to him explain his theory on this clip from TED.
Interestingly his claims have also been confirmed by my own research, when I questioned 260 from my database about what they loved and hated about their working life.
When I think back over my own experiences of when I worked in the corporate world I felt that my job offered very little autonomy, a modest amount of mastery and I can honestly say I struggled to find a sense of purpose. Although I was helping people to finance their businesses it got lost in amongst the tangled web of regulations and procedures.
In her book “Escape From Cubicle Nation” Pamela Slim castigates our corporate employers for their stifling approach to looking after their people and encourages us all to break out and seek the work we love.
If you want to break free are teetering on the edge of the work- life- cliff try this short quiz to find out how much your current work matters to you.
Does Your Work Matter to You?
Taken from the blog written by Steven DeMaio
This is not a definitive self-test for people who are contemplating leaving their jobs – It’s merely a set of touch points to use as you work out what really matters to you in your work life. The key thing is to answer the questions honestly and to reflect on your answers.
1. To what extent does my work affect the lives of people outside my company?
A. greatly
B. somewhat
C. little or not at all
2. How often do I get to see the effects of my work on people who are not my colleagues?
A. frequently
B. sometimes
C. rarely or never
3. How much do the people affected by my work need it in their lives?
A. a great deal — their lives would be worse off without it
B. to some extent — the benefits are marginal but have some value
C. very little, not at all, or I have no idea
4. How well do the people affected by my work match up with the kind of people whose lives I’d like to be affecting?
A. the two groups match up very well
B. it’s a matter of chance
C. they’re not the same, by and large
5. How long does the broader impact of my work last after I complete it?
A. a long time
B. a moderate while, but not long
C. its value is fleeting
6. When I think about the broader effects of my work, how do I feel about it in the moment?
A. good or great
B. indifferent
C. bad or ashamed
7. When I imagine myself thinking back on having spent years doing the work I do, how do I expect to feel?
A. satisfied and proud
B. indifferent
C. regretful
8. When I think about my work, how often do I envision doing something more satisfying to me and useful to others?
A. rarely or never
B. moderately often
C. very frequently
9. How often do I get to laugh genuinely and heartily at work?
A. frequently
B. sometimes
C. rarely or never
10. When work makes me tired, as inevitably happens, what kind of tired feeling is it?
A. usually the good kind, like exercise gives you
B. it varies — sometimes a good kind, sometimes bad
C. the kind that makes you feel sad, lazy, useless, or angry
Now count up the As, Bs, and Cs.
As a rule of thumb having at least five As and no more than one C is a healthy goal. Where do you stand relative to that?
Jo x
Filed under: From Exhaustion to Energy
I want to build a house of straw, a cosy, warm, peaceful comfortable simple, house of straw. I want to live the simple life; collect rainwater, harness the warmth of the sun, grow my own vegetables, bake my own bread and eat homemade soup……WAIT, STOP… What’s going on?? What’s got into me? What’s this Three Little Pigs mimicry all about?? I know I’m a country girl at heart but I have a champagne and shoe indulgence like the best of them. So why my yearning to live like a bunch of fairy tale characters?
Could it be that I’m suffering from hamster wheel syndrome? You know, when life feels like it’s on a speeding treadmill, where you wake on a Monday morning and run faster and faster chasing deadlines, commitments, “should do” tasks, emails and phone calls.
Yes I feel tired, all I want to eat is chocolate biscuits and I’m waking up at night with lists in my head. Frankly I’m fed up with chasing my tail and dancing to other people’s tune.
So is my straw fixation purely as a result of 21st century overload, where the simple life I crave is a result of chasing the Joneses but never quite reaching them. The simple life, to flow with life and ENJOY it rather than battle against it feeling like an exhausted furry rodent.
Having said all that will the drastic step of ordering 20,000 straw bales solve my problem? It feels like it will but I know from experience that the “I’ll be happy/relaxed/thin/fat when…..” thing doesn’t work and where ever you go your troubles always come with you.
What I could do with is “straw space” in my head so that I can live the simple life without leaving my armchair.
The simple life to feel relaxed and cope without pressure
The simple life where I’m not tired all the time.
The simple life where I can nourish myself with real food
The simple life so that I can take notice of what’s going on around me
The simple life to exercise without pressure, guilt or pain.
The simple life to enjoy time with my friends and family
To simple life to just be…..Me.
From Exhaustion to Energy……….join me as I found out how. I will share my findings with you on my blog and via this monthly email.
Join the campaign to go back to basics and feel alive, calm and revitalised.
Jo
PS My husband is very relieved that I don’t need to build an actual straw house…….. he ‘s afraid of the big bad wolf!
Filed under: Happiness
What are you expecting to receive from your loved one this Valentine Day? A dozen beautiful red roses? A card and a box of chocs? Or will it be the dreaded bunch of wilted petrol station carnations?
Valentine’s Day fever has exploded in recent years. The Greeting Cards Association estimate that over 1 billion cards are sent to celebrate this day of love. With this, our expectations are higher than ever to exchange momentous expressions of love between our significant others. The only problem with this is the danger that our feelings of happiness and self worth get mixed up in the frenzy of the Valentine’s Day hype. And that we use external trappings to reinforce feelings about ourselves. For example; A dozen red roses –I must be beautiful, Chocs – I’m nearly there, maybe if I try a bit harder……, Carnations – There must be something wrong with me…….
Everything you attract into your life is a reflection of what you feel you deserve, what you feel you are worth and how highly you value yourself. So if you think you’re a waste of time you can pretty much guarantee others will think that too. We are all born with high self worth, yet somehow along the path of life our stocks get severely depleted. When this happens, because we need to feel good about ourselves, we begin to look outside ourselves for reinforcement and expect others to give it to us. The problem is, true self worth can only be self generated and as the world we live in these days offers little certainty or security it’s more vital than ever to find safety from within.
So whether you receive roses, chocs or wilting carnations this Valentine’s Day ask yourself the following questions;
- On a scale of 0 to 10 how do I rate my self worth at the moment?
- If my rate is less than 10, the three reasons why this is so are….
- What stops me from liking and loving myself more?
- How would my life be different if I believed in myself more?
- Five things that make me unique are….
- Three things that I wouldn’t want to change about me are….
- The main reason I’m glad I’m me is….
Don’t worry if finding some of the answers a bit of a challenge. You’re beginning a new way of thinking – the liking and loving yourself sort of thinking. Keep practising and soon it will become automatic and feel very natural. Caring about wilting carnations will become a thing of the past!
Filed under: Happiness
http://www.lancashirebusinessview.co.uk/news-details.htm?news_id=117
Filed under: Happiness
I don’t know about you but one thing that’s really getting me down this New Year is the avalanche of “self improvement” advice that’s being thrust upon on us from every possible source. You only have to pick up a magazine to have “how to feel happier in 60 seconds, how to have perfect skin, 6 emotional workouts” screaming at you from the front cover. Log onto the Internet and we are bombarded with advice on; getting rid of bingo wings in 5 easy steps, ways to keep New Year’s resolutions and in the words of Peter Kay; how to lose 10 stone in a daay! Even the newspapers are grabbing their share of the perfectionist cake by showing us how to make zero calorie recipes and reminding us of the evils of red wine (woe betide it if you like gin and tonic!)
Transforming ourselves from mere mortals to super humans in 10 easy steps is now the expected norm.
How are we supposed to keep up with this exhausting pantomime? And what’s it all about? Why this drive towards a perfectionist society? Do we really need it? Are we all so woefully inadequate that we need this step by step positive thinking instruction? Soon we won’t be able to walk out of our front doors without following a 3 step plan.
And the worst thing is THE GUILT – yes the guilt. I’m struggling to get out of bed in a morning as it is but all this stuff is making me hide under the duvet even more, not wanting to peek out in case I get struck down by a giant thunderbolt cos I ate the whole top section from the box of Milk Tray last night and I’ve not shaved my legs for 2 weeks.
What’s wrong with who I am now? Why do I have to be happier, healthier, slimmer (well maybe a little bit!) – the perfect mother, wife, lover. Am I not ok as I am?
In an attempt to find some sanity I sought out my favourite book of the moment “F**k it – the ultimate spiritual way” by John Parkin. He tells us to stop struggling and do what we fancy and suggests that saying f**k It is the perfect Western expression of the Eastern spiritual ideas, of letting go, giving up and finding real freedom by realising that things don’t matter so much (if at all). “Stop clinging to how you want things to be and try letting go – of your ideas, beliefs and expectations. Accept life for what it is,” says John “accept life in all its wonderful, stressful, lonely, awful, delightful ways. The truth is there’s not a lot you can do about most of it.”
So will you join me in the fight back? Will you join me in saying “Hey leave us alone we’re ok as we are thank you very much. We know we might need to lose a bit of weight, have days when we bounce out of bed with vim and vigour and days when the couch is firmly stuck to our bums, days when we cry like babies and days when we laugh like hyenas, but SO WHAT – we’re human and we’re lovely and we accept ourselves just as we are, warts and all and its OK. “
Custard cream anyone?
Filed under: Happiness
Well it’s that time of year again. The time when we resolve to quit smoking, lose weight, start getting early nights or being nicer to Aunty Mary.
Yes, The time of the New Year’s Resolution.
Apparently 44% of us make New Year’s resolutions but unfortunately research has shown that actually keeping a New Year’s resolution beyond January is actually quite hard and many of us fall by the wayside and return to our old habits by the time the month is out.
But resolutions made right can have a huge difference in boosting our happiness and our lives. So how do we resolve effectively? Well here are some tips to help you do just that – to make your resolutions for life not just for January!
Tip 1
Be specific – One common problem is that we make vague promises such as; I’m going to get out more, eat healthily, be more optimistic etc. and these are hard to measure and therefore difficult to keep. So choose more concrete choices such as; arrange to meet my friends for a night out once a month, take a salad to work for my lunch 3 times a week, listen to my favourite music when I’m feeling gloomy.
Tip 2
Take baby steps – Remember the saying, “Rome wasn’t built in a day”? Don’t make your resolutions too ambitious so that you set yourself up to fail before you’ve even started. Begin small and take baby steps along the way. For example if your resolution is to start doing more exercise don’t resolve to go to the gym every day, but start by going out for a walk at lunch time and slowly weave exercise into your life. Push yourself too hard and you may screech to a halt.
Tip 3
Try to choose a positive resolution rather than a negative one. For example; resolve to be early to appointments instead of stop being late. By thinking positively about the year ahead and of what you can achieve instead of what you lack will boost your spirits and help your changes be lasting.
Tip 4
“Act as if” you have already achieved your resolution. Conjure up the image of yourself in your mind and really put yourself in those shoes. What would that perfectly healthy person do right now? What would they eat? How often would they exercise? That’s what you do now. ACT “AS IF” … Moment to moment to moment. And, sooner than you think you won’t be acting anymore. How amazingly cool is that?
Tip 5
Choose a help buddy. Being accountable for our actions is a key to success when it comes to making and sticking to resolutions. We all need help from time to time, so choose a willing friend or join a group who will to support you with your plans and help to keep you motivated.
Good Luck!
LifeBooster – committed to the wellbeing of all
Filed under: Work LifeBoosters
Today is Remembrance Day.
I don’t know about you, but I always feel quite emotional when I watch the wreath laying service at The Cenotaph in London on Remembrance Sunday.
Besides the tragedy of loss of life, I think the other aspect that makes tears well up in my eyes is watching hundreds and thousands of people stood in total quiet, paying their respects to the brave during the 2 minutes of silence at 11.00am. Totally connecting with each other and being completely “in the moment” You can hear a pin drop on a street in London on which you wouldn’t normally be able to hear yourself think. The power of likeminded feeling from all those people and thousands more besides is incredible. Despite what we read about in the press; human spirit and goodness is very much alive.
It is right and fitting to pay our respects to the brave who have lost their lives and indeed those that continue to face battle. But besides Remembrance Day and maybe occasional times when 2 minutes silence is appropriate for other events, how often do you take your own 2 minutes, to stand, sit, lie down, walk and think of nothing other than what is? Just like a busy London street our lives (particularly our working lives) are generally run at a frenetically fast pace. WE NEVER STOP. We rush from task to task, appointment to appointment, phone call to phone call.
Today’s exercise is to give yourself some metaphorical space and take some slow time. Take your own 2 minutes, 10 minutes, half an hour or even one hour…
When you choose to put aside time to connect with yourself you will find yourself calmer and more relaxed.
Find somewhere you know you won’t be distracted or disturbed. And just do whatever feels good for you. I find colouring in really peaceful!! my friend, a high flying exec takes her “2 minutes” from walking her dog. Others I know like to take their lunch to the park.
Do anything at all and simply let your mind drift. There is great power in stilling you mind and slowing down your thoughts. You will be able to hear your intuition more clearly when you take the time to tune in.
Put all worries aside and just focus as best you can on being in the present moment. The more you practice being still the more time you will want to spend. It really does feel that good. Things you were worried about before won’t seem so daunting.
Practice makes perfect, build up to regularly taking one SLOW hour a day (at least!)
Filed under: Work LifeBoosters
National Stress Awareness Day – Wednesday 4th November 2009
How stressed are you?
We have been aware for many years now that stress and emotional attitudes have a massive effect on our overall health and wellbeing. Despite this however, illness caused by stress continues to dominate newspaper headlines and doctors waiting rooms.
According to the Labour Force Survey an estimated 442,000 individuals in Britain, who worked in 2007/2008 believed that they were experiencing work related stress at a level that was making them ill. In addition the survey suggests that self-reported work-related stress, depression or anxiety accounted for an estimated 13.5 million lost working days in Britain in 2007/08. The HSE estimates that the cost to the UK of workplace stress is £530million.
As the name suggests National Stress Awareness Day has been designed to highlight the symptoms of stress and educate us to reduce its impact on our lives. This year its theme is “Stressing the Positives.” You can get more information about the campaign here
But here are 5 LifeBooster Stress Busters tips to help you cope.
- Look at the bigger picture of life. As the saying goes “Don’t sweat the small stuff” Decide if the things that upset you now will matter in a year, six months from now, or even next week or tomorrow.
- Take 3 DEEP slow breaths – this will help you to relax and slow your heart rate down.
- Don’t dance to the “should” tune. i.e. I should work harder, I should earn more money …..Change those shoulds to the things that bring joy to your life.
- Get more sleep – relaxing sleep. Spend time preparing for bed e.g. have a warm bath, read a book – switch off the phone and your TV. A good night’s sleep will help you cope with what’s thrown at you during the day.
- Say “cheese!” Give a smile, Smiling and laughing releases endorphins and makes us feel better.Try it and see what sort of reaction you get back – monitor how that feels.
Filed under: Work LifeBoosters
The English Poet, John Donne wrote that “No man is an Island, entire of itself…“ As such, we all need friends and contacts to be happy and successful in both life and business.
In response to my email asking you to tell me what you loved about work many of you said, “the people I work with” “my clients,” “working in a team,” versus what some of you said you hated “ being isolated,” “working on my own,”
Your responses reinforced scientific research which tells us that connecting with other people is critical for promoting wellbeing and also acting as a deterrent against mental ill health such as stress. Indeed studies of “very happy” people have shown that they nearly always have excellent relationships. A work buddy can act as a sounding board or provide a helping hand. If you work on your own, connecting with a friend by phone will work just as well – its having the support of someone “being there” that’s most important. Being able to verbalise frustrations to a friendly ear can prove tremendously cathartic.
- We need to build relationships that help us work happier. In order to do this; Ask yourself and write down “What are the 5 most important things I look for in a friendship?” e.g. loyalty, fun and laughter, support etc.
Now try fulfilling those needs for the people in your working life and notice your happiness levels intensify. When we give people the things that are important to us we fulfil our own needs at the same time. We connect with each other through our feelings.
- I recently read Julia Cameron’s book, The Artists Way. In the book there are many exercises where you are encouraged to write about things, people or places that we appreciate and or are grateful for in our lives. It is always an uplifting exercise and indeed studies have shown that expressing gratitude is a lasting way of experiencing feelings of happiness. So try this exercise; take 10 minutes and write a compliment for every person in your department/organisation/office. YES – everyone – even that office layabout and the skiving boss who leaves you to carry the can. I will guarantee it will lift your spirits! Let me know how it goes…..
Have a Happy week at Work and watch out for Work LifeBooster number 2 next Wednesday!!
Filed under: Work LifeBoosters
Four years ago I escaped….. from jail……… No! No! No! Its ok I’m not writing this from a UK non extradition hot spot in the deepest Amazon rainforest. I can walk around the UK quite unafraid of getting arrested (well most of the time!) When I talk of jail I mean the metaphorical type. To get an accurate picture, instead of “jail” read “corporate world”
I was a business manager for a high street bank, worked 12 hour days and juggled sales targets, customers and 2 young children. I went from home to work to home again, jumping through ever changing manager’s hoops, exhausted, I drank too much, ate too much and shopped too much – all in an attempt to try to feel better. It was a life on a miserable hamster wheel, a personnel number tattooed on my forehead, at the beck and call of a bullying leadership.
As happens with so many people it took death and bereavement to shock me out of my robotic life. It was the death of my father and a serious health scare suffered by my brother that enabled to me say out loud “there must be more to life than this.”
Over the following few months the voice of freedom got louder and louder inside my head and my work got more and more unbearable until one day I quit, resigned from my job after over 20 years service with the organisation. With no job to go to and only vague ideas of other avenues to explore I left.
I walked out of jail.
Drastic action I know. Some called it brave, many called it stupid – but fast forward four years and here I am still standing and happier than I’ve ever been.
That’s my story AND I do realise that quitting and changing careers is not an option available to everyone.
Indeed many people enjoy the work they do but are frustrated by poor management, shed loads of paperwork and a lack of control they feel about their working lives. But as we spend nearly 25% of our lives at work, it seems an awful shame if we spend this time – approximately 99,177 precious hours unhappy.
Work LifeBooster – 5 ways to a happier working life is about building actions into our daily working lives to improve our emotional wellbeing. It’s about making our working lives better from the inside – not dependant on job promotions or salary increases. I’ll send you one new daily action each week for the next 5 weeks. If your working life can be improved by incorporating these 5 suggestions into it – then that’s got to be a good thing hasn’t it?
Look out for your first Work LifeBooster next Wednesday.
